Darnell Watson

Darnell Watson is a promoter, singer, organizer, and MC from Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. He is known for his fanatical adherence to 1970s funk culture and fashion, organization of hastily planned impromptu community events, running legal and quasi-legal business ventures, and as the singer of The Darnell Watson Funk Experience house band. He is the third son of Randy Watson, who is known for being the singer of the band Sexual Chocolate.

Watson has described himself as “always hustling”. His “experiences” are almost always for-profit endeavors but generally accomplish some good for the community, so his activities are usually tolerated by community members and law enforcement.

Appearance

Darnell Watson is a black man in his late 30s or early 40s. He has a Jheri-curl hairstyle and always wears gold Elvis sunglasses. He wears impeccably tailored orange suits and colorful paisley silk shirts. Occasionally he will appear in more casual attire if he’s working one of his “experiences” himself. He has also appeared in a royal purple robe with gold rope accents as part of Darnell Watson’s Magic Show Experience.

Community Outreach

Watson has organized and/or officiated the following recurring community events and services:

• Darnell Watson’s Court-Ordered Alcoholics Anonymous Experience
• Darnell Watson’s Inner City Summer Camp Experience
• Darnell Watson’s Little Kings and Queens Daycare Experience
• Darnell Watson’s Magic Show Experience
• Darnell Watson’s School Bus Experience (with $5/plate meals on the way to school)
• Darnell Watson’s Dog Adoption Experience

Watson possesses an almost supernatural ability to hastily assemble an event. According to rumors, he once produced twelve folding tables, a PA system, three grills, a whole hog, 30 cases of soda, 4 kegs of beer and a funk band within ninety minutes of somebody suggesting a block party.

Business Endeavors

An example Darnell Watson Product

• Darnell Watson’s Ghetto Tour Experience
• Darnell Watson’s Pig Roast Experience ($5/plate)
• Darnell Watson’s Philly Inner City Community Center Annex Dojo Experience
• Darnell Watson’s Jheri-curl Activator
• Darnell Watson’s Car Wash Experience
• Darnell Watson’s Couch Protector
• Darnell Watson’s Low-End Fortified Wine

One Time Special Events

• Darnell Watson’s Funk Experience Revue Featuring Sexual Chocolate’s Randy Watson and The Reverend Cleofus James
• Darnell Watson’s Late Fee Amnesty Night at Good Video